currently listening to: 從心愛你 [Daniel Chan]

after a week of thinking things over and over, i think i will be able to take literally ANYTHING that is gonna happen on monday. hopefully no one will come probing about my results. i don't wanna beat anyone up. *wahahhaha*

and i think i have successfully convinced my parents about going to a poly!!! that is, if i score more than 17 points. it wouldn't make sense to struggle in a faraway JC that i am not even familiar with, isn't it? that would be even worse than staying in ACJC. at least AC has better facilities (fully-equipped gym!! swimming pool!! huge track!! tennis courtS!! cafe!! super big hall!! the list goes on!!), even though it's super far away.

a real interesting thing that happened today:



this one came out real good. can't see the camera or the chain and it looks exactly like michelle's gonna come up with some "wei-pai-qi-gong" or something, doesn't it! *wahahahah* ok, maybe we shouldn't have taken the pictures in the toilet. kinda ruined the atmosphere of the picture. but it was really funny the way we marvelled at the effect and spent so much time in a 'Girls' toilet when it was apparently the Gents (other than the sinks, we don't see anything mounted on the walls in the Ladies, do we?).

oh and did i mention that i watched Howl's Moving Castle already? i am IN LOVE with hayao miyazaki's works! man, it was REALLY REALLY GOOD. extremely hilarious, cute, and so sweet and sad at times. anyone who needs a free review can look for me. anyone who wants to watch the movie can look for me too. *wahahaha* i don't mind watching it a few more times *happy*happy* in any case, I STRONGLY RECOMMEND IT!!!

my favourite character? aWww... u know i have a soft spot for anime guys... *wahahha* Howl rocks!! and the 'feather-duster' dog (named by michelle) is extremely cute. you should have heard how many times the audience laughed like hyenas at the sight of that dog. and the part where Markl pulls down his hood... priceless... *doubles over with laughter*







ok, my over-enthusiastic passion for anime has overwhelmed me again. maybe i will grab an anime series at the expense of all my homework. that's not such a bad idea isn't it? i'm not gonna stay in ACJC anyway. *wahahha* they can't do much to me even if i don't do my work.

fine. maybe except for Ms Marhaini's work. man, she is really an intimidating woman. *shudders* we were really pissed off when the trainee teacher sat in for the lesson and Ms Marhaini suddenly got SOO strict with us like never before. hey! she used to treat us better than she treats any other class, considering the fact that she's like the fiercest female teacher in the school. yeah, so now we're all cursing that trainee teacher for apparently 'giving stress' to Marhaini during lessons.*curses*

oh, and the whole of the class is planning to 'pon' school on Monday *wahaha* (4e5 ppl, does this sound familiar?) why? cuz all of us feel that it is quite dumb to go back and sit through chapel for half the day and face only Ms Marhaini for the next half of the day then go back even more depressingly to our respective secondary schools to get our results. *wahahaha* told you we were slack. we have a reputation.

hmm.. but speaking of getting back the results, i guess i will really have to try my best not to appear super depressed in front of everybody. that is the last thing i'll ever want to do: get everyone to have a last impression of me tiao-ing everybody else and stomping straight out of school with a black face and a red nose. i'm serious! i get THAT bad when i'm in a foul mood.

seriously, i kinda regret working so hard for my studies. it isn't like my parents DEMAND for me to get top results, or that i am even CAPABLE of getting really good results. maybe it's just the thing within me to want to get the best of whatever i lay my hands on. but now i feel i've tried too hard. too hard that even getting a >15 range upsets me when some people rejoice about it. maybe i should take things more lightly and seriously get a life. *wahahah* 'seriously get a life' sounds ironic~

but what will it be like on monday? will i really be able to live through it with a smile? will i really be able to get over it and just carry on with my life without blaming myself? will i really be able to tell others that i'm ok when i may not really feel that way inside? will really i be able to live with this disappointment?

*sigh* life is tiring and it makes me wanna quit. but everyone has to go through disappointment somehow, so i guess after this great big disppointment over my results, i'll be able to face anything else that comes. hopefully.

life is not gonna go easy on me, but i plan to live through it anyway.








*notice that i've been wearing the same clothes. *wahahha*

記憶は明日のために強さになるものだよ。きっと。