currently listening to: Perfect World [Fushigi Yuugi- Nuriko]

don't accuse me of lazing around with less than 2 weeks to the 'O's!! to make up for this, i'm gonna study till my brain switches off in front of the computer today.

i just can't help it!! it's Graduation Night today! i had exactly no idea that it was going to be so much fun. i had never taken so many pictures before, had never received so many presents before, had never been so high before, had never smiled for so for long before my whole life~

it's an unforgettable night. i was looking through the pictures i had taken today, or rather yesterday, and at the last picture i found myself grinning away and i couldn't stop it. events that happened all through these four years kept floating back into my head as i looked at one picture after another and they kept me smiling for so long. this means that i had spent a happy 4 years in Hai Sing, something that i had never thought about. i mean, i never thought that i was actually that happy throughout the 4 years. now that i recollect-- i must be the luckiest person on earth.

it's the friends lah. thank you so much.

god, i'm starting to feel sad. i'm actually leaving the school!!! i'm actually leaving the school where i got to know my precious Pigs. Co., the classroom where i lamed around everyday with Aboone, Judy, Alrina and Pipi, the place where i fought so many examination papers, the area where i spent so much time singing my lungs out, the location where both my tears and laughter had been accepted graciously by wonderful friends.

from now on, will they be gone forever? will i forget them as easily as i forget my wallet, or will they forget me as quickly as they can make new friends? will we lose contact like me and my primary school gang? will we greet each other when our paths cross at Orchard Road one day? will we even recognise each other when youth abandon us many years later?

will we laugh as innocently together as we did today?

i've always hated the process of growing up. that's why i try to hold on to as much of the memories and old thinking that i had even when years pass me by. and the years in Hai Sing are definitely things that i will remember even if i do suffer from amnesia one day.

dots. the song's getting to me. I WILL NOT CRY!!!

i was reading Judy's blog just now. she kind of surprised me with the extent of her 'thing' for err.. 'little lulu'. as i read every line of her entry, i felt as though i am seeing a mirror image of myself in later years of Primary Six. i can understand perfectly how she feels about the parting but i guess everyone handles it differently.

Don't cry! because tears will always find a way to make you give things up. Don't cry! because fond memories should deserve laughter. Don't cry! because you have been blessed with love for another.

which reminds me, i'm finally going to put my four years of perserverance to the test! four years of K-ing books, four years of restraining myself from falling for anyone else, four years of reminding myself again and again of what i really wanted, four years of counting the days to the day where i will find out whether my decision was a wise one, I'M FINALLY GOING TO TAKE THE TEST!!!

and i hope that i can pull it through. because i don't want tears that will make me give things up again, ESPECIALLY this one.

akiramenai.

記憶は明日のために強さになるものだよ。きっと。